Are you in an early love or a new relationship? Trust me, the feeling is surreal. Butterflies flying in the belly. Everything looks so poetic. You start living the brand new love like those portrayed in rom-coms or fairy tales.
Sorry to interrupt in your bubble world. Let me tell you with fresh bonds come fresh troubles too. What if your partner keeps nagging you with constant texts and calls. Or maybe he is indulged in too much PDA (Public Display of Affection). Or he gets overly jittery if you do not reply on time. He tags along everywhere and every time even without an invite. And what about ditching his friends all the time to be with you. He has no life of his own.
You can’t help it. You might just overlook these happenings in the beginning. But dear, don’t get stuck in such situations. Let’s be adults and face the fact that it gets annoying to be with someone who is needy and mushy all the time. Being possessive is a thing but obsession is sometimes dangerous. Once in a relationship, if you start feeling suffocated, then it can create distance.
If all this seems familiar to you, here’s how to deal with your clingy partner.
- Reconsider your feelings
Look at the other way round. Is your significant other being clingy or are you not that into him? The problem may lie within you. There is a chance you might be losing interest. You might not be as invested as your partner is.
Take a moment and be honest with yourself.
- Communicate the issue
Communication is the key. Listen to his side of the story. Speak up your grievances. Make him understand that while you appreciate all the efforts he is doing, you would still prefer some alone time and space.
- Convey your feelings politely
Imagine telling your partner that you would love to be yourself while studying, working, or going out with friends, and it all went wrong. “I need space” might be interpreted by your love as “I need less of you.”
Explain your emotions gently. Do not mention the word “clingy” or “suffocated.” It will come off as impolite.
- Set boundaries
Define certain boundaries in your relationship, of course, healthy ones. Spending Too much time together can stifle your bond. Similarly, calling every hour, keeping tabs all day long, losing control when you don’t respond to his texts or calls, etc.
To put a rest to this clinginess, be clear to him what you want. Come to a common ground about what is ok and what is not. Set mutually agreed parameters.
- Teach him the meaning of “Me Time”
Loving someone does not imply losing one’s individuality. A long-lasting relationship calls for giving each other some space and privacy. It is totally reasonable to have some time apart.
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Tell your partner to spend quality time with his friends and family. Have “Boys night out” or “Girls night out.” Both of you will benefit from this “me time.”
- Pour appropriate love and care
One of the reasons for being clingy is that your partner is insecure. He thinks you love him less. You don’t care enough. Try to cut the roots of insecurity and fear.
Compliment him, appreciate him, assure him, and ease him. Tell him that he is the one for you. And you are not going everywhere.